Monday, January 29, 2018

Another SJW storytelling What-if

I talked before about how stories of the next generation of heroes are terrible when told according to the SJW Narrative. I haven't seen The Last Jedi but I've read enough, and heard enough from friends who are devoted fans of Star Wars to know it fits the bill.

I earlier imagined how the next generation part of Ace Attorney would be if it had been written according to the SJW playbook. Now I thought of another, more specific application that shows how much The Last Jedi despises the past.


What if there were a Legend of Zelda game where you played as a young Princess Zelda, growing up in the castle under the guidance of your mother the queen, also named Zelda, listening to her wonderful stories of the hero that saved the kingdom several years ago. She even shows you the hero's sword, the blade of evil's bane, the Master Sword, kept safe in the treasure vault.

Then one day, darkness arises from the desert, monsters start appearing, and Ganon arises to attack the castle. In a desperate flight, Queen Zelda takes the Master Sword and entrusts it to the young princess and tells her to find the hero in the forest and beg him to come to their aid.

And so Princess Zelda sets off on her quest. There would be monsters and dungeons; you couldn't use the Master Sword so it could make for some creative gameplay. And then, finally, you find the hero, an older Link than is usual for the games, but still capable of saving the kingdom as he did years ago. Princess Zelda bows in respect and offers him the Master Sword.

And he throws it into a pit.

A Zelda game treating its lore like that would be horrendous.

Image copyright Disney
Horrendous.

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